I was an Atomic Robot Jungle Vixen!

I was just thinking of superheroes. Sure, they don't exist, but could you imagine what would happen if they suddenly did?
It's not the concept of adults running or flying around in spandex or lycra or whatever, no, I'm thinking of the religious panic it would cause. Come on, people flying around with strange powers, you know there would be people thinking they were angels or demons and that Armageddon was upon us. I've also got a feeling that most of the superheroes would be accused of some sort of Satanic collaboration.
Put that on top of all the fundamentalists freaking out over not being raptured, and it would be an enoromously fun sight to behold.
Damn it, we need superheroes! I don't care if it's impossible for a woman to fly unaided or a man to lift a building over his head! I want to see roundtables of religious leaders foaming at the mouth at how unnatural it is to shoot energy beams out of one's hands and demanding the government do something about it! I want to see the new pope denouncing invisibility as a crime against God and nature!
Ohhhhh, not to mention the Bush administration's reaction to bullet-proof people capable of juggling tanks! That would be great!
Of course, with the kind of luck the world has, if people started gaining superpowers it would only be the right-wing nutjobs getting them. Of course, if conservatives and religious fundamentalists got superpowers, they'd more likely end up villains than heroes (why start on a new path now?) so we'd really be in for it.
Never mind then. Superpowered people would really suck. Except for me, and is it really too much to ask to be able to fly?

posted by Tabby at 4/14/2005 02:50:00 p.m.

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